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credits

released July 25, 2015

Duane - Mario
Brando - Luigi / Koopa
Brentalfloss - Toad
Amber Thompson - Princess Peach

Album art by Larry Rosenfeld.

Music written by Koji Kondo. Instrumentation arranged, performed, and produced by Brando.

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about

The Adventures of Duane & BrandO Flint, Michigan

Hi! We are The Adventures of Duane & BrandO. We are a multi-instrumentalist Nerd Rock duo that covers and parodies songs from video games. Enjoy!

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Track Name: Mario 3
Well we're back in this bitch (you know we're scratchin' that itch)
Man I'll throw a turtle shell up at you and I'll bust your lip
Third game, and fuck gettin' old
All we do is fart and curse so fuck it were golden
The king has been transformed and Toads are callin'
Now I'm in the grassland and Luigi's followin'

We're in the grassland (You're in the grassland)
I got cash in my hand (You got that cash in your hand)
and I'm rollin' up coinz 4 dat ass
I got 15 cents and you're all gettin' $mashed
Y'know cuz we're swag and stuff
and we're gettin' crunk or whatever

Oh no, Desert Land
This shit's gettin' outta hand
The sun, not my frand
The fun just never ends

Larry and Morton and Wendy O
Iggy, Roy, Lemmy, and Ludwig (fa sho)
They got brand new wands n shit
Taking over castles, real pains in the ass so
I'm back with my suspenders on, gonna dust off my cap
Shit I'll fly through the air just like a racoon
leaving Koopalings doomed
choking on fuckin' Goomba boot stew

We will stomp yo face
into outer space
That don't make no sense
Mario Bros. represent

The name's Toad, you can call me Toad
You're up in my house now, my little humble abode
Ain't got no guest bed, guest room, not even a guest chair
No bathroom, just the 3 wooden chests there
So lemme guess you're gonna take my best shit and
peace out like WHAT, nah, kick it with me for a bit
In this kingdom, I'm largely ignored, but yo I
got more cribs than a maternity ward
I got homes 'n hoes in each world, widespread
Yeah the ladies love my big ol' mushroom head ;)
You wanna have some fun, lemme spin ya some cards
My minigames bring all the boys to the yard
But what I really hope ya get is nothin' at all
You wanna rob Toad's house? Yeah you can suck my tiny balls

Ba-balls

Swing your arms from side to side
Take a dump in yo pants
Take a step and back again
That's The Mario Dance™

C'mawn, I'm C-C-Crushin in this boot
couldn't run and lost my frog suit
Find the secret block and put this whistle on a long toot
Ghosts is comin' at me gonna look 'em in the eyes
Don't you know I'm goin' on a boot ride

Check it out I got tha boot
Take a walk on yo face
Don't you know I got the boot
Put you back in yo place

Hoppin' around
Stompin' tha ground
takin' you down
400 pounds
Actually it's a shoe
Nobody cares

Hey look at that I got a star (yeah)

I'll Duane The Rock Johnson
Dude
DUde
Really
What, you mad bro
I'm not even mad
Well I'm sorry brah
but it looks like I'm about to take you
to Suplex City bitch.

I say I say I say
Why you takin' my star from me
You got 29 lives, man, I only got 3
Man that's bologna, ya stats are below me
I'll stick a feather in your cap and I'll call it rigatoni

You would call it rigatoni, you fat fuck
Come on man, I'm not even fat
I've just got a lotta big bones
Yeah that's cuz you're in the dog house
Learn how to string a rhyme together fucko.
Oyeah, so original

Hit the pow block, flip the spiked turtles over
Gonna hit it right back an' I'll take outcha shoulder bone
Cut it out you fucker, just leave me alone
I'm gonna jump on your parietal lobe
You fuckin motherfucker

Waitaminute there's a secret in this tunnel
Nope, piranha plant, you're no fun (yo)
Rock a Tanuki like I did it for nookie
A falling statue in the air like (you fell and you shook me)
I'm the mustach plumber fuckin' pummel the sun
I'll fuck your mama in the butthole and go out on a fun run

He's on a fun run (I'm on a fun run)
I know that, I'm not a dumb dumb
Rockin' this motherfucker destroyin' this place
John Leguizamo, no stache on my face
I got my Hammer Suit, implied facepalmin' steady and I'm-a
throwin' shit up like mom's spaghetti
Booty booty booty

My fellow Koopas!
The time for change is upon us
The time has come to take back what is rightfully ours
The time has come to take back the Mushroom Kingdom
We will conquer all who oppose us!
We will never give up, and we will never surrender!
We will clean our teeth on the bones of our enemies
Can you dig it?!

Larry you do nothing, nothing you do
I'm going to do you like a mid-level boss and not even mention you
Morton's fat, whatchu think about that
I woulda hit him 3 times but he collapsed and had a heart attack
Hey there Wendy, save those hoops fo yo mama
I'ma warp past the castle to avoid the drama bitch
Iggy you're a nerd with a fat head
Iggy you're a nerd with a fat head
Roy I'll royally rumble your face right now
Leave you rollin' like a tumbleweed tumblin' down
Took down Lemmy wasn't even a brawl
Sorry little buddy hate to burst your balls
And then there's Ludwig, he doesn't even amuse me
He aint nothing but a double-stompin' ass Gary Busey

Hey toadstool look at me, I made it to the castle
There wasn't no thwomps or falling blocks on the screen I couldn't handle
Still comin' with a fireball in my hand
Would have had the hammer suit, but damn the Ice Land
Now to King Koopa's lair with a smile on my face and Luigi, he's my right hand man
omg waffles

We're the Mario Bros., and plumbin's our game
We're not like the others who get all the fame
The kingdom is safe, except World 3
Fuck that level big fish scare me
You kidnapped the princess
Ya dun fucked up
Now we're comin' for your mf dinosaur nuts
Pickin' up coins, It's time ta git paid
If I wasn't out here I'd be out gettin'

Koopa's comin' for ya, I'd rather just ignore ya
Why don't you retire take your fat ass to Florida
Ya freakin' retard idiot fag
fat motherfuckin' dicklickin' shit in a bag
ya fuckin' asshole cocksuckin' bitch ass ho
I'll fuck your fuckin' shit ass bitch fuck tha flo'

You're jumping on the ground, you're about to fall through
Iggy must've got his fat head from you
It's time to save the princess get out of my way
And then luigi jumped in and saves the day

Wher muh chikn wangs?!