LP Of Devastation [Remastered]

by The Adventures of Duane & BrandO

supported by
Jonas Neefs
Jonas Neefs thumbnail
Jonas Neefs Still waiting on those 3 duck burgers. Favorite track: DUCK HUNT.
Dia
Dia thumbnail
Dia Been following these guys since I was in middle school, I'm in college now and my love for them hasn't wavered! Their lyrics never fail to make me laugh and their talent for creating songs that can be both enjoyed by gamers and rap enthusiasts alike is unrivaled. Favorite track: DOUBLE DRAGON.
Kazuo TS
Kazuo TS thumbnail
Kazuo TS I actually discovered these guys a few years ago while browsing playthroughs on YouTube and ever since then I've been hooked. These guys are extremely talented and really brought some nostalgia back as well as made my childhood that much more badass. I highly recommend you check them out! Some of their solo work isn't bad either! Favorite track: DOUBLE DRAGON.
Spade
Spade thumbnail
Spade They are fucking awesome! I'm glad this finally available! Now I don't have to keep going to their songs via youtube. I can only hope now they got this out there; they can start really picking up steam and make some more awesome music. Favorite track: BATTLETOADS.
Bass 'n' Beets
Bass 'n' Beets thumbnail
Bass 'n' Beets 2pac ain't got shit on this pac, yo Favorite track: PACMAN.
more...
/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

      $9.99 USD  or more

     

1.
04:48
2.
3.
03:04
4.
5.
6.
02:24
7.
01:27
8.
01:58
9.
02:25
10.
00:45
11.
01:45
12.
03:00
13.
14.
02:29
15.
07:52
16.
04:13
17.
02:10
18.
03:39
19.
06:41
20.
06:51
21.
22.
23.
24.
03:36
25.
03:37
26.
03:37
27.
28.
03:36
29.
30.
31.

credits

released September 26, 2013

Recorded, Produced and Remastered by Brando. Engineered by Amber Thompson. Lyrics and vocals written and performed by Duane Zuwala and Brandon Lackey unless otherwise noted. Additional vox by Eman Laerton (Air [Remix], Leo Camacho (Sonic, Final Fantasy, Double Dragon, Metroid), Mike Christensen (Final Fantasy, Battletoads, Double Dragon), Ashleigh Zuwala (Final Fantasy, Battletoads, The Carpet is Lava), Ashton Zuwala (The Carpet is Lava, Endless Relentlessness), Jordan Lackey (Final Fantasy), Ally Lackey (Metroid), Sue Whitmore (Final Fantasy), Danielle Curavo (Pacman, Zelda II), and Michael Crane (Pacman, The Carpet is Lava). Additional guitar by Jesse “The Destroyer” Mardis (Final Fantasy), Project Genesis (Sonic), and Chris Holland (Zelda II, Kung Fu [Remix]). Lyrics for Knuckles (Sonic), the Black Mage (Final Fantasy) and Abobo (Double Dragon) written by Leo Camacho. Lyrics for the Red Mage (Final Fantasy) written by Jordan Lackey. Photography by Rick Joy. Graphic design by Brando. Cover art by Alex Keswick.

Soundtracks composed by: Koji Kondo, Masato Nakamura,Brad Buxer, Cirocco Jones, Michael Jackson, Sachio Ogawa, Masaru
Setsumaru, Yoshiaki Kashima, Tatsuyuki Maeda, Tomonori Sawada, Masayuki Nagao, Jun Senoue, Miyoko Takaoka, Masanori Hikichi,
Jun Chikuma, Hirokazu Tanaka[, Toshio Kai, Akito Nakatsuka, Hirokazu Tanaka, Tchaikovsky, Kinuyo Yamashita, Satoe Terashima,
Hidenori Maezawa, Jun Funahashi, Yukie Morimoto, Koichi Sugiyama, Junko Tamiya, Nobuo Uematsu, Makoto Hosoi, Takafumi Inamori, Ryo Koike, David Wise, Kazunaka Yamane, Hirokazu Tanaka, and Takashi Tateishi. Domo arigato! Thank you very much!

PUNCH OUT versions 1-3 and PUNCH OUT [EDIT] are archived versions and have not been remastered

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

The Adventures of Duane & BrandO Flint, Michigan

Hi! We are The Adventures of Duane & BrandO. We are a multi-instrumentalist Nerd Rock duo that covers and parodies songs from video games. Enjoy!

contact / help

Contact The Adventures of Duane & BrandO

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Track Name: BATTLETOADS
Verse:
I'm gonna hit you in the face with my big ass fists, 'cause we're the Battletoads bitch and we don't take no shit.
Enemies step up and they get knocked the fuck out! (Pow!)
Knocked the fuck out, so what the fuck's up now?
Punch a bird in the face and use his mouth as a weapon.
Ride a jet to the goal and keep them all guessin'.
How did they do that?
Do what?
Get through that.
Place with the snakes?
I don't know, shit.
But it's true that we're comin' with the force, and we'll be there soon.
You can't stop us motherfucker, no matter what you do

Chorus:
'cause we're the Battletoads. (We're the Battletoads)
What what, what what what we're the Battletoads.
Represent motherfucker, we're the Battletoads.
I told you motherfuckers better leave us alone.
Messin' with the best, and everyone knows;
you never mess around with the BATTLETOADS.

Verse:
Here we go.
Round 2, what the hell you gonna do?
When we take the enemy and kick his ass to the moon?
See, I beat the Ice Zone with precision.
Surfed on the river like a man on a mission.
Destroyed the enemies and left 'em all bitchin'.
I'm so hungry I could eat a whole kitchen!
See them fuckin' Ninja Turtles ain't got shit on this.
What?!
Whoop their ass, introduce 'em to my fists.
I may be warty, but I got some skillz,
I got a bitchin' arm band, and a license to kill.

Chorus:
We're the Battletoads. (We're the Battletoads)
What what, what what what we're the Battletoads.
Represent motherfucker, we're the Battletoads.
I told you motherfuckers better leave us alone.
Messin' with the best, and everyone knows;
you never mess around with the BATTLETOADS.

Verse:
Professor T. Bird with an assignment for you.
It looks like Princess Angelica and Pimple are doomed,
unless you hurry hurry hurry go and rescue them soon!
Show the Dark Queen the meaning of what it is we do.
Here we go, now!

We're gonna break out, like a skin disease.
Save Pimple and the Princess from the Dark Queen.
I'm tellin' ya right now, Professor T.
There ain't nobody gonna fuck with me!
Make my way through the stage, I'm a fist of rage!
Just stay the fuck out of my way, okay?
See I'm very pissed off, it's a fucked up day, and in a fucked up way
(I'm gonna mess up your face!)
I'll take the bitches on the right, you take the left. (No!)
Kick they ass to the moon, knock they ass retarded.
Break through with fortress with some style, too.
You'll be askin' yourself- "What'd I get myself into?"
We're comin' to the rescue like heroes do.
When we make it to the Queen I'll cunt punch her, too.
We're the Battletoads bitch, you'd better watch your back.
I'm gonna lay you out flat like a heart attack! (For sure!)

Down to the right, up to the left.
Bring on them holes, bitch it ain't no contest.
I'm dodgin' and weavin', barely competin'.
Ride on the ramp, and crash through the ceilin'. (Woo!)
There's a hole in the floor. (Watch it!)
Jump over it, it ain't there anymore!
We're comin' through y'all, better know your role.
'Til the Dark Queen ain't the Dark Queen no more.
'Til my broham ain't kidnapped no more.
('Til we find the Princess and tag-team that whore!) Yup!
Bring on the rat, and whoop that motherfucker like BOOM.

We're on our way to the Dark Queen's Lair.
We've gotta prepared 'cause we're almost there.
Gonna put her in a state of disrepair. (Come on!)
She's already impaired. (Here we go, haha)
And when we enter the battle, think twice, watch what you're doin'.
One mistake that we make and Pimple and the Princess are doomed!
Don't come over to my side; I'm left, you are on the right.
I hope she puts up a fight, 'cause BATTLETOADS ARE BRINGIN' THE BOOM.

(What the fuck are you doin' here Battletoads?!
I will destroy you! You can't hit me, I'm a woman!)

I realize you're a woman but I really don't care.
You're gonna have to tell the doctor you fell down the stairs!
You're gonna need them sunglasses for them black eyes, whore.
I've been drinkin' since breakfast, I don't care any more!

Spinnin' around in circles, kickin' me wearin' me down.
If I were a Ninja Turtle I would be dead by now!
But I got skills beyond recognition, a fist in your ass.
That's what you get for fuckin' around with Zitz and Rash!

Hey Zitz, check it out I got a baseball bat.
It's my woman-beatin' Louisville whackamasmack.
This damn crack's got me hungry, let's go get us a snack.
So we can eat after this gang-bang and take a nap. Yeah!

Sounds good Rash, but where the hell did you get a bat?
This game doesn't have bats, lay off of the crack! (Shiiiiit...)
Why are we even rescuin' this worn-out whore?
I say we take Pimple out, that way both of us score.
HIGH FIVE!
Track Name: DOUBLE DRAGON
Billy:
D-D-D-Double Dragon, fuckin' your face. It's time to duke it.
Billy and Jimmy Lee bitch, fightin' is useless.
'Bout to break out and smash to get my girl back.
Fuckin' now it's time to taste this Sosetsuken!
With the lightnin' speed, you can't be fuckin' with me.
I'll fuckin' punch you in the face until my fist bleeds.
My bro Jimmy's got my back, he'll always be my nigga.
He won't think twice about pullin' the trigger.
New York's gone to shit since the apocalypse hit.
Me and my brother are the only people here legit.
Damn bitch, take this fist I'm gonna steal your whip!
Grab your face and straight kick it like I'm tryin' to break it, c'mon!

Jimmy:
I see you're gangster. I'm pretty gangster myself. (Pow!)
Jimmy Lee and I'm bad for your health.
Selflessly devoted member of the Fuck You Club.
Clubbin' you like a baby seal and cuttin' you up in the tub.

Billy:
You see the Black Warriors? (Jimmy: Yeah.)
Their shit's kind of whacky.
The world's seen the last of-. (Jimmy: Who?)
William Mackey, bitch! I'm fuckin' pissed, 'bout to take that whip!
Hit 'em so hard they'll be shittin' bricks!
Abobo don't know, he'll fall in a hole.
Double Dragon bitch, you don't even know.
About to infiltrate, bust a hole in the gate.
Grab a crate and straight put a dent in your face.
'Cause New York's gone to shit since the apocalypse hit.
Me and my brother are the only people here legit.
Damn bitch suck a dick stay away from this shit!
I'm 'bout to wipe out the crime rate, bitch, any minute, c'mon!

Jimmy:
STOP! Nail time; can't touch this motherfuckin' gangster rhyme.
Write fail on your face with the flick of my wrist.
That's how I roll, know this, I got lots of tricks.

Jimmy:
You can't fuck with this 'cause we're dangerous.
Step up to the plate we'll rearrange your shit.
D-D-Double Dragon, draggin' ya down to the ground.
Jimmy and Billy representin'.
(Quit messin' around!)
Machine Gun Willy goin' down tonight.
Fightin' the Black Warriors until everything's alright again.
Rescuin' Marian, carryin' nothin' but pain.
Same shit same fucked up day, c'mon.

Billy:
Billy and Jimmy, two headbuttin' motherfuckers.
See these dragon tattoos? Don't fuck around cocksucker.
Take this bat and crack a black hole in your head.
(You'll never beat me fuckers!)
I just did, you're dead!
*Uuuugh*

-guitar solo-

Abobo:
Yo motherfuckers yeah my name is Abobo.
I keep my shit tight though, and all of my homies know.
Don't fuckin' look at me like I'm Donkey Kong. Wrong!
I'm twice as good lookin' and three times as strong.
So you motherfuckers think you can just go crossin' tracks?
Don't relax in this alley, you're gonna get some whip cracks.
Yeah that's right I fuckin' slapped your bitch and walked away...
But after one night with me, she's gonna wanna stay.
So just get the fuck back and stop a'runnin' your lips.
Walkin' all up in my hood dressin' like Bloods and Crips.
Doin' ballet like West Side Story in your matchin' outfits.
Oh look it's Billy and Jimmy, the double faggoty twins!

Billy:
Well listen up Abobo, you fuckin' homo!
Fat-headed, pencil-leaded, I'll stab your ass bro.
You're goin' down in the hole, you don't even know.
Jump, kick to the face, takin' you down with one blow!

Jimmy:
Oh no, little bro, you killed Abobo!
There's suttin' that I think you should know before we go:
I am the Shadow Boss. (Billy: NO!) Yeah sure, why not.
And while I'm at it, your girlfriend thinks I'm totally hot.

Billy:
Well if that's how it's gotta be I'm gonna take you down too!
I thought you were my brother, now you're dead, fuck you!

Jimmy:
Fuck me? Haha bitch, fuck me?
Let's take it outside, bro, then we'll see.

Billy:
How dare you go against me?! I trusted your shit!
I thought you was my brotha, not some punk-ass bitch!
A double crosser not a dragon wipe that smile off your face.
Or I'll smash back and crack your fuckin' jaw with a mace!

Jimmy:
My, my, my, my fist will hit you, so hard.
Make you look like Charizard.
I'm too legitimate to handle, bro.
Like Mario put it best (Mario: "Let's-a-go!")
Join us; don't be so stupid.
Teach all of my warriors Sosetsuken.
If you don't, I'll put you in a headlock, G.
By the way, I think your girl really likes me.

Billy: You can't fuck with this shit I'll fuckin' kill you!
Jimmy: I will give you such an atomic wedgie!
Billy: I am tellin' Mom.
Jimmy: How you gonna tell Mom?

Billy:
Keep talkin' motherfucker I'm just settin' you up for this:
Fist of rage, why you act that way?
I'm a better fuckin' fighter than you anyway.
(Jimmy: LOL)
Just gimme my girl and get your ass home.
Zoey's on in five-minutes you never miss that show!
No no!

Jimmy:
What you know about the 101?
Leave Zoey alone, Nickelodeon's fun.
Unlike me, you'd better run,
think twice about where you're hidin', big cats eat mice.
My tiger-style is devastatin'.
You know you love it brother don't be hatin'!
Kick, punch, it's all in the method.
Not mother-approved but totally kid-tested.

Billy: You can't fuck with this shit I'll fuckin' kill you!
Jimmy: I will give you such an atomic wedgie!
Billy: I am tellin' Mom.
Jimmy: You wouldn't!
Billy: You stupid motherfucker I'm just settin' you up for that BOOM.
Bitch!
Track Name: METROID
Intro:
Samus Aran in her yellow spacesuit,
jumpin' and bobbin and weavin' shootin in heavy pursuit
of the mechanical life vein, Mother Brain (do the math)
Foil her plan to eradicate everything in her path, see,
The Metroid hold the key to ultimate reign,
suckin' the fuckin' life out from overtop o ya brain
It's time to step up your game and go beat those, yo,
no cheat codes, it's time to go beast mode (beast mode)
Reclaim the planet for the Space Federation
in the name of the wasted would-be generation
In the name of all that's wrong, in the name of what's right,
grab your arm cannons, get in the ship and take flight
Now it's time to go hard, and it's time to go home,
and it's time to do both, and to do it alone
And there's hope in the universe: that hope is you
You can't save, you can't shoot down so don't try
there's no map all the rooms look the same you will die
(No pressure)

Samus:
Droppin' bombs on this motherfucker, destroyin' this maze
Samus Aran eradicatin' the Mother Brain in this place
Fat pay, I'm a renegade, the top of the class
Fuck around and get a power bomb stuck in your ass
See all the space pirates came to use the Metroid for evil
Harness the power for weapons and kill millions of people
But with a bounty on your head, soon you're gonna be dead
'Cause I'll shoot a fuckin' missile that'll explode in your head
Take notes motherfucker as I lock on my weapon
Sentencin' evil to death, no need to keep you all guessin'
Watch your ass Mother Brain, 'cause I'm fuckin' insane

Leo Cameo-cho:
By the way my name's Leo, and I'm obsessed with this game

Samus:
I break down the roof with these power bombs yo
Flip shoot repeat, I got the motherfuckin' flow
I'm gonna make it to the room, I'll be seein' you soon
My fuckin' missile-happy ass will be sealing your doom, motherfucker
Kaboom!
Track Name: DRAGON WARRIOR
I'm gonna club you in the teeth with my bamboo stick.
Dressed in leather with a shield, ancestor of Erdrick.
On a quest to bring peace to the land that we're livin' in.
On a mission to hit the Dragonlord with my fist.
I've got a pocket full of herbs for when I'm powerin' up.
Found Erdrick's Armor near the tree and punched a Wraith in the nuts.
I learned a couple of magic tricks, you can call me Houdini.
I saved the Princess like a motherfucker, barely competing.
And now she's all over my ballsack like stink on shit.
But I got more important things to do, so fuck that bitch.
See ya later King Lorik, thanks for savin' my state.
Sorry I can't stay for dinner but I'm gonna be late.
The Dragon Warrior, baby, drivin' the ladies all crazy.
Dudes wearin' armor despite me they are all jealous they ain't me.
I'm on a mission to kill, I'll punch a bitch in the grill.
Cut every fuckin' finger off until he's beggin', I will.

I'm on my way to the motherfuckin' castle.
With this new sword, gonna be fuckin' 'em up.
Level 22 Master, fuckin' up bastards
with this steel ring that I found in the trunk.
And nobody's gonna touch my style.
So infantile, to think you'll be fuckin' with me.
Gonna drink this forty yo, throw some bows.
Kick your ass into the tree.
Bitch please, I'mma punch them shits, kick them shits.
Use some HURTMORE on that bitch.
Fuck yeah, I'mma wring they neck, put 'em in check.
Then bust my damn chick.
With this quarter pounder bro, make her moan.
Send her ass fuckin' home.
But right now I'mma grab that bitch and hit them shits in the back with my FO FO.

I'm goin' through the cave with a torch in my hand.
Fightin' off these motherfuckers like a man with a plan.
I found a secret entrance way, in the back of the throne.
The stupid fuckin' Axe Knight better leave me alone.
Or I'mma break his damn legs in three places, for real.
Take his shit and hit his fuckin' torso with my shield.
Oh shit I'm bein' stared at.
Come here Wizard. Now this time I fight back. I'll break that.
Got this sword, you can fall down 'cause bitch you're whack.
Never thought my fuckin' ass'd make you die like that.
Oh no my torch went out, I gotta save my spells.
Aww, what the hell.
RADIANT; I'm almost out any way.
Finally I found the exit way to this maze.
And now I'm approachin' Dragon Lord with some words to say.
Somebody better dig him a grave. For real.
You ready motherfucker? Well try this on for size, bitch.

Punch to the face, kick to the shins.
Use some HEALMORE, now let me begin.
Yo I'm deader than shit, it's only fair to warn.
'Til you show your true form.
Now I'm blockin' and kickin' I can't fuckin' get it.
I barely got any spells left.
I thought I was winnin'.
I guess I was forgettin' the power of his fire breath.
As I fall to the ground, I think of the town.
How in the fuck could I let all these nice people down?
Track Name: GUERRILLA WAR
Verse:
Stand in line for the USSO show, for sho'.
Guerrilla War, we're gonna blow a fuckin' hole through your stereo.
(I love this country, got a flag on my coat.)

Pickin' up survivors and take 'em through the jungle kickin' and screamin'.
Even if it means my own life, I'm takin' one for the team'n.
(Gonna reach inside this tank and blow a hole in your throat.)

Suicidal bombers or somethin' man, I ain't scared of shit.
Drop a copter, tell the doctor that I'm runnin' this bitch.
(Shit I got multiple gun wounds, and I ain't falled yet.)

Fuck yeah, my brother from another mother trailin' behind me.
Take a bullet for that man, so be it nigga. Finally.
(Gonna bomb this cocksucker flying by on his jet.)
Let's go to war!

Chorus:
I make Rambo look like a little bitch!
I am so deadly they see me comin' and take a shit!
Leavin' it all behind to fight in the war.
Gettin' the highest score possible and fuckin' the whores!

Verse:
Clear my throat; then cock it back on the mountain.
Oh shit I killed a hostage, -1000.
(Brush it off, it ain't nothin', I got huntin' to do.)

Pick up the AKK, blow a hole in your face.
Walk away, it's time to pay then get laid.
On the draw I'm on the ball against the wall. One by one my enemies fall.
(You can't even hear this part, I got a rock in my shoe.)

Fuck yeah, I'm fightin' for this country and I'll die for the peace.
They're gonna need a snow shovel to scrape your ass off the streets.
(Well I got pride on my side inside of this Indian bitch?)

Me and my brother are punk-ass motherfuckers from Flint-town.
Droppin' bombs on this shit-pile, and wearin' the crown.
(Gonna line up all these motherfuckers, leave 'em dead in a ditch.)

Let's go to war!

Chorus:
I make Arnold look like a little bitch!
I am so deadly they see me comin' and take a shit!
Leavin' it all behind to fight in the war.
Gettin' the highest score possible and fuckin' the whores!

Yeah, 2007, bitches.
Track Name: BOMBERMAN
Verse:
One bomb, two bomb, three bombs blown.
The name's Bomberman, like you didn't fuckin' know.
I got my, helmet on and my bitches in check.
Packed full of ammunition so I get some respect.
Take these big ass boots and kick a bomb in your face.
Tear the enemies down and put 'em back in their place.
I'll make; 9/11 like the 4th of July.
On a rocket ship comin' headin' straight for the bad guys.
'Cause I ain't goin' to take no shit.
Light the wick on my motherfuckin' dynamite stick.
Break the wall down, tear that fuckin' shit out the room!
Sneak up on the enemies and seal their doom.
Bomberman; and y'all can't fuck with that.
Step back, light a smoke, drink a forty and laugh.
Tell your boss I'll be there in a minute to front.
After I ride this kangaroo and fuckin' scratch my nuts.

Chorus:
It's Bomberman, B-B-B-Bomberman.
B-B-B-Blowin' shit up all across the land.
D-D-Destroy the enemies and leavin' this place with a fuckin' hand grenade that'll explode in your face!
It's Bomberman.
It's Bomberman.
B-B-B-Blowin' out your brains 'cause I'm the man with the plan.
And n-n-nobody fucks with me, bitch.
You heard me, oh no.
Here comes Bomberman.

Verse:
I'm TNT.
I'm Dynamite.
I'm here representin', yeah I'm down for life.
You can't fuck with the man with the master plan.
Bitches think I ain't comin'?
You can bet that I am.
I got a brand new suit and I can walk through the walls.
I don't care if you're a bomber, if you're 10-feet tall!
I'm still comin' to get you, shit I'm packin' the heat.
They're gonna have to fuckin' scrape your ass off the street.
So go ahead nigga, talk that shit.
I guarantee you're gonna live to regret it.
Break the wall down, tear that fuckin' shit out the room.
Creep up on the enemies and seal their doom.
Bomberman; and y'all can't fuck with that!
I'll pull the pin and blow a motherfuckin' hole in your ass.
So tell your boss I'll be in there in a minute to front.
After I ride this kangaroo and fuckin' scratch my nuts.

Chorus:
It's Bomberman, B-B-B-Bomberman.
B-B-B-Blowin' shit up all across the land.
D-D-Destroy the enemies and leavin' this place.
With a fuckin' hand grenade that'll explode in your face.
It's Bomberman. (It's Bomberman!)
B-B-B-Blowin' out your brains 'cause I'm the man with the plan.
And n-n-nobody fucks with me, bitch. You heard me.
Oh no. here comes Bomberman.
It's Bomberman, B-B-B-Bomberman.
B-B-B-Blowin' shit up all across the land.
D-D-Destroy the enemies and leavin' this place with a fuckin' hand grenade that'll explode in your face!
It's Bomberman.
It's Bomberman.
B-B-B-Blowin' out your brains 'cause I'm the man with the plan.
And n-n-nobody fucks with me, bitch.
You heard me, oh no.
Here comes Bomberman.

Verse:
Explodin' minds one bomb at a time.
I'll stab you in the ear if you don't feel my rhyme.
It's Bomberman baby, I'm the cream of the crop.
I'm gonna need a crowbar to get your bitch off my cock!
Do a little jig and blow a hole in your face.
Disco dance to Prince and take a leak on your grave.
If you ain't feelin' me bitch, I don't give a fuck!
Tell 'em BrandO!
(I'll kick you in the face if you don't step off my nuts!)
Track Name: DUCK HUNT
Duane:
I'm bringin' home dinner, better warn the Miss.
I got my trusty dog sidekick to fetch them shits. (Yep.)
That gigglin' little bastard's got me stressin' tonight.
But I hate bein' laughed at, so my aim's on tight.
I got a, straight-shooter that I keep by my side.
Three bullets in the chamber, like I need it. (Yeah right!)
Tell Brandon Lackey "get the grill ignited".
Because the whole damn neighborhood's gettin' excited, yeah!

BrandO:
Quack quack boom, bringin' nothin' but doom.
When the ducks fly up I'm clearin' the room.
My phat mad skills'll have you holdin' your breath.
I'll have three duck burgers with a side of death, please!
I wanna kill that motherfuckin' dog.
But every time I go to shoot, the safety is on!
One of these days I'll give you something to laugh about!
Duck Hunt, baby. What a pain in the ass, I'm out.

Duane:
You rap like a cracker, leave my doggy alone.
You're just jealous I got more ducks than you to bring home!
I just sit back, waiting for 'em to get in position.
Ducks drop from my motherfuckin' ammunition.
No bitchin' and whinin' when I miss one, punk.
I got two more in the chamber straight ready to bust.
Tell Brandon Lackey he needs to finish this track.
Because I'm gonna eat dinner and take a nap, yeah.

BrandO:
Duane Zuwala, shootin' like a girl! (Hey!)
Step aside, Sally, let me give it a whirl.
I got the mirror in my hand with my back to the screen.
Shootin' without even lookin' like nothin' you've ever seen before.
I make it look easy droppin' ducks left and right.
I could do this all night, but I'm at level 99.
So I'mma fire up that grill and we're just gonna pretend;
that it's duck that we're grillin' up instead of man's best friend!
Track Name: PACMAN
Verse:
Pac-Man comin' through, straight huntin' for fruit.
Eatin' pills like a waka waka comin' for you.
I got ghosts in my way, but I ain't afraid.
Super Pill's gonna make you run from me in this maze.

Blinky. Pinky. Inky. Clyde!
What are we gonna do boys?
Runaway!
Hide!
Boogity boogity boo I'm comin' your way and I'll
Keep comin back like every day.
I'm-gonna-go-over-here-right-now.
Gonna-run-into-him-when-his-pills-run-out.

Be careful Clyde!
You're about to get eaten!
Ain't no time to attempt retreatin'!

Chorus:
Gobble down these halls, I'm the pac with the most.
Eatin' pellets like it ain't no thing; oh shit it's a ghost!
Nooo!

Verse:
1 Pac down, 3 Pacs to go.
2Pac ain't got shit on this Pac, yo.
Tummy like a Magical Bag of Holdin'.
Stage complete, now it's reloadin'.
I'm gonna creep up in the corner 'til the Ghosts come down.
Gobble down pills to the other side now.
I'm eludin' pursuin' the pills with passion;
Ms. Pac-man couldn't handle this kinda action.

Boogy boogy boo, I'm back you guys!
Get back in the box Clyde, for real this time!
We gotta get him before he gets us!
No way!
Yay!
Who rides the short bus?!

Chorus x2

Verse:
Yay!
Come here, motherfucker!
It's pay-back time!
Oh no!
You're goin' down Pac-Man!
We're gonna eat you!
He's gonna eat us!

Waka waka waka gonna eat ya face.
Waka waka waka waka better keep away.
I got a Super Pill and now you're blinkin' blue.
Puttin' you back in the box if I run into you.
You can't run from me. Shit I'll cut through the stage!
Meet you on the other side and gobble ya face.
Pac-Man waka waka waka wak wit' me
Eatin' cherries waka waka. I'm the waka king, c'mon!

Chorus x2
Track Name: MARIO
I'm on my way to the castle and shit, with a fireball for Koopa for stealin' my bitch.
See I'm a plumber with an attitude, and when it's pointed at you;
You'd best believe I'll be comin' with tricks. (Now hear this!)
Mr. Goomba, tell King Koopa the Mario Brothers are back in the house- (To throw down)
'Cause your gravin', misbehavin', no fakin'.
Soon you'll be shuttin' your mouth. (For sure now!)
I'm gonna put you in your place, 'till the princess is safe.
Nobody's gonna be playin' with me. (See G?)
Mr. Koopa, I'mma straight shoot ya, boot ya, drop your ass into the deep- (L-l-lava.)

Luigi on the scene, don't forget about me!
I got your back and I'm dressed in green.
And even if you don't make it to the end of the game,
King Koopa's gotta deal with me. (Do the Mario!)
Swing your arms from side to side, c'mon it's time to go!
(Do the Mario!) Take one step, and back again... Just like that... Haha.

Wait a minute, there's a secret in this tunnel.
I need a mushroom, so pause on the rumble.
Bring the beat back, bring back the trouble.
If you clog the toilet I'll be there on the double.
I'm the mushroom poppin', body droppin', lasagna eatin', I'm defeatin';
All the rompin' motherfuckers like-. (What?)
Cross your fingers like-. (What?)
This plant is a cunt and I'm about to chop it down, punk.
Full power, I'm at the last stage.
Take a drag of this cigarette and blow it in their face of the hammer throwin' - that keeps runnin' their mouth.
Throw a plunger at that bitch and stomp his ass to the ground.

King Koopa, leavin' everyone in a stupor.
Watch your ass Mario, you ain't so super!
Just wait 'till you get here, this ain't no dream.
I'm gonna eat the fuckin' Princess with cherries and whipped cream.
Even if you win you'll have to do it again, and again...
I always save the best for the end.

Over the lava, past the ring of fire.
When I make it to King Koopa I'll make his ass expire.
With a fireball down his throat, drop the bridge, up in smoke.
Who put this axe here, is this a joke?!
You'd better watch your ass 'cause I ain't blowin' no smoke.
Now choke on this, 'cause you're about to be toothless! Gwahahaha.
You're all talk, it's useless!
You've got a damn platform over your head, stupid!
See you in game 3, until then we'll see.
But now I've got some business with the Princess, G.

HA HA HA HA
Track Name: KUNG FU
I'll take five at one time, knock you down in a row.
Dodgin' knives with the quickness and a kick to your scro'.
I got that kung fu kill you without thinkin' attitude.
I'll straight up fuckin' Bruce Lee ya kick your ass to the Moon.
"So door igamo set say llamo Tamagotchi Ali"!
I dunno what exactly that means I don't speak no Chinese.
One with my foot; one with my fist.
One not breathin' no more, now hear this!
I got that fuckin' Chuck Norris Texas Ranger attitude.
Straight up smack you like a bitch and then be laughin' at you.
You see this dojo ain't big enough for the both of us, G.
I gotta kung fu you before you FU me!
Track Name: NINJA GAIDEN
Verse:
Yeah...
I'm gonna gonna slit your fuckin' throat, without leavin' a trace.
With-a-with-a without warnin' have a ninja star, stuck in your face.
N-N-Ninja Gaiden here residin' with this sword in your back.
Only a Ninja with the skiz'll have you bleedin' like that.
Motherfucker I'm dangerous, spontaneous.
And there ain't nobody gonna handle this.
I don't give a fuck, man I'm serious.
Shit, I'm outraged and I'm furious!
My motherfuckin' skills'll have you fleein' fear.
Here let me spell it out for you make it perfectly clear!

Chorus:
Ninja Gaiden! (One fist, two fist go!)
No sense in hidin'! (The master with the flow!)
I ain't lyin'! (There ain't no place to go!)
Annihilatin' 'em all! (Go, go, go!)

Verse:
Like the wind I'll knock you over with a blow to your face.
K-K-K-Kill the enemies without leavin' a trace.
N-N-Ninja Gaiden here residin' with this sword in your back.
Only a ninja with the skiz'll have you bleedin' like that.
Motherfucker I'm full of hatin', there's no debatin'.
You KNOW I'm gonna retaliate.
I won't hesitate, I'll annihilate.
I'll even creep up while you masturbate!
My motherfuckin' skills'll have you fleein' in fear.
Here let me spell it out for you, make it perfectly clear.

Chorus:
Ninja Gaiden! (One fist, two fist go!)
No sense in hidin'! (The master with the flow!)
I ain't lyin'! (There ain't no place to go!)
Annihilatin' 'em all! (Go, go, go!)
Track Name: TETRIS
Chorus:
Tetris is awesome.
It makes people toss up their hands and scream obscenities.
Don't you know I'm a fuckin' Tetris pro?
I'm about to teach all you n00bs geometry.

Verse:
I'm a fuckin' straight line, takin' four at one time.
Add a Tetris to the high score, making it mine.
Blowin' minds, droppin' lines like I'm Courtney Love.
Shit I can lay down flat if push comes to shove.
I'm movin' so fast, down don't matter no more.
I'm on Level-9 bitch, straight clearin' the floor.
Z-block gonna drop and I'll slide myself under.
Down at the arcade they call me the boy wonder.
Everyone's waitin' for me, the coolest block in the game.
Makin' all the other blocks look totally lame.
Saved the day... But I ain't got no name.
My Tetris high score will be my claim to fame.
When I walk down the street, I waddle from side to side.
I ain't got no legs they call me the french fry.
Fuck around and I'll drop ya like a dumb blonde ho.
When you're done with me you'll need Dr. Mario.

Chorus:
Tetris is awesome.
It makes people toss up their hands and scream obscenities.
Don't you know I'm a fuckin' Tetris pro?
I'm about to teach all you n00bs geometry.

Verse:
Playin' Tetris, droppin' blocks right here, over there, everywhere.
That ain't even fair.
(I don't even care.)
Here's a T, there's an L.
I'm gainin' speed, Level-3, all I need is just a freakin' Square.
(Put it over there!)
Now I'm on my way to Level-9, scorin' high, blowin' minds, all the freakin' time. (Like it was a crime.)
I'm on fire (I'm at level 9).
I'll retire (I will never die).
No score higher... than mine.

Wait a second BrandO it is my turn to rock! (No!)
Droppin the blocks in the places and shit don't you know that that is how it goes. (I will distract you while you rap.)
Cut it out you fucker it is still my turn to rock! (No!)
That shit is fuckin' annoying you bastard I'm trying to finish the game. (How are you so good with small gaps?)

Cut it out now! (No!)
Really cut it out! (Nope!)
I will start to shout! (So?)
Fuckin' shut your mouth!

I'm motherfuckin' bringing down the roof! Turn, aim, and shoot!
L-Block, T-Block I speak the truth!
I'm the king of this game, and I'm takin' names!
Fuckin' cut it out BrandO I'm resettin' the game!
(You will never beat my high score, Duane. Oh shit!)
Track Name: CHEETAHMEN II
Chorus:
Cheetahmen! We are the Cheetahmen.
(Don't you know that we're the fuckin')
Cheetahmen! We are the Cheetahmen.
(Hercules, Apollo Aries)

Cheetahmen, will kill you.
Cheetahmen, will fuckin' kill you.
Cheetahmen, we're cheetahs.
Cheetahmen, karate cheetahs.

Don't you know that we're the motherfuckin' Cheetahmen.
(You know it.)
Don't you know that we're the motherfuckin' Cheetahmen.
(Yeah, that's right bitch!)
Don't you know that we're the motherfuckin' (Cheetahmen)
Don't you know that we're the motherfuckin' (Cheetahmen)
Don't you know that we're the motherfuckin' Cheetah-Chee-Cheetahmen!

Verse:
Lights, cameras, Action 52.
I'm a cheetah with a bow who's only got two moves
Walkin' down the road to the invisible dude.
You ain't got no excuse, it's '92.
We're the Cheetahmen killing everything in our path.
But I can't duck down, I'm jumpin' over your ass.
Coins poppin' up, but I don't know from what.
In the next stage I'll make a motherfuckin' noise when I jump!
Don't fuck around, walkin' lizard with an attitude.
I'll shoot you in the face, dude, and I ain't even lie to you.
My moves are pitiful but this robe is gloris!
Now it's time to fight Dr. Morbis! (For sure, bitch!)

Chorus:
Cheetahmen, will kill you.
Cheetahmen, will fuckin' kill you.
Cheetahmen, we're cheetahs.
Cheetahmen, karate cheetahs.

Don't you know that we're the motherfuckin' Cheetahmen.
(Yeah, that's right bitch!)
Don't you know that we're the motherfuckin' Cheetahmen.
(You know it.)
Don't you know that we're the motherfuckin' (Cheetahmen)
Don't you know that we're the motherfuckin' (Cheetahmen)
Don't you know that we're the motherfuckin' Cheetah-Chee-Cheetahmen!

Verse:
Now it's time to fight Dr. Morbis.
It's a crime, these moves are so gloris.
Time to die, you're slow like a tortoise.
I'm in my prime, karate, karate cheetahs!

I will run, cause I'm Dr. Morbis.
Reappear, cause I teleportis.
You are fail, should have been abortis.
And now it's time to battle, I'm Dr. Morbis!
Cheetahmen you are my failed expirement
I'm so sorry, you don't meet the requirement.
You're a sign I should have gone into retirement.
I'll run into you and drain your life of its entirement.

What the fuck? Why you runnin' through the screen fo'?
Why the hell ya gotta be so mean fo'?
I'll jump behind you, fuckin' shoot you with an arrow.
Scream in your face like I'm Robert DeNaro!
Track Name: CASTLEVANIA
Squibilyflabidydoo~
Armed with a whip and a fuckin' stake, I'm gonna find Count Dracula and seal his fate.
With a one, two, three, (HAHAHA!)
Annihilatin' zombies on my way to the gate.
It's Simon Belmont, the vampire slaughtera'.
Equipped with holy water and I got enough for all of ya.
I'm callin ya...out. Takin' ya... down.
Killin' you again puttin' you back in the ground.
I'm not fuckin' around I'll throw a knife in your face.
I'm gonna kick your ass all over the place!
It's a disgrace; and you know that I'm comin', even though in the next game I'll be replaced.
Uhh, whoops! I don't know that yet.
But I'm the illest fuckin' cracker that you've ever met.
Get it? That shit is funny.
Now I'm gonna wreck your castle and takes all your money.

I'm gonna take you down...
I'm gonna take and put your pale ass in the ground, 'cause I'm coming!

All this talk is getting on my nerves!
I'll make you eat your words, then I'll eat you for dessert.
You'll never defeat a godlike beast as I... I will make you cry.
You're brave, Mr. Belmont, but you're still a fool!
To think the Prince of Darkness less than cruel?
Never underestimate the pain in my heart.
I'll strike you down, and send you back to the start!

Goin' down to Castlevania.
Test me and I'll tear you apart.
Goin' down to Castlevania.
Gonna put this stake inside your-.
Simon Belmont, in the house.
Gonna tear you apart, from the inside out.
Fight off the monsters and make it to the room, where you're gonna meet YOUR DOOM.
Gonna break it down, gonna stake ya now.
Gonna smash you apart like the Trade Towers.
Gonna go to town, show you who wears the crown.
You and me goin' round 'n round (Don't make me laugh!)
Fuck all that bullshit I'm comin' to get you.
You're gonna wish that I'd never have met you!
So put your neck in my hand, motherfucker.
I'm takin' over this land, motherfucker.
It's goin' down bitch, get ready for war.
As I put my foot through your fuckin door!
Hahaha... yeah.

I'm gonna get you, bitch!
(You're going to have to catch me.)
I told you before not to fucking test me!
(You've just made the biggest mistake of your life.)
Is that right?
(You'll die tonight)
Look it's been a long day and I'm wearin' down.
Get your ass over here and let's finish this now!
(You think you can defeat me? Please.
You're weak in the knees, come taste my disease.)
Take this knife to the face!
(Not my beautiful face!)
Your days of destruction will soon be erased.
(Let's face it, you're falling apart.)
How 'bout this stake to the heart?
(I'm going to bite you!)
Owww! Fucker!
(We're family now.)
You're forgetting one thing, Count Chocula... I just put my stake in ya.
Yeah, HAHA... Simon Belmont, bitch. Take that shit, Dracula. Fucker.
Track Name: SONIC
Sonic is the name and speed is my game
I make thunder and lightning look like one and the same
Rockin' the red shoes, blue 'do, voodoo curse
Upon anyone that's makin' the planet any worse
Like this Dr. Robotnik / Eggman dude
He thinks he's got a fightin' chance against a hedgehog with an attitude
Just wait until I see him again
He'll wish a thousand fuckin' times he didn't do what he did

Come on!

That's why they call me Sonic
I'm faster than the speed of sound and light combined
And when I roll into a ball and I'm breakin' your shit
Spinnin' and hittin' you with maximum force that won't quit
And when you can't take it any more I do it again
Because I gotta fuckin' win in order to save my friends, man!
Ain't no one gonna be fuckin' with me

(One time. Two)
Well hardy har har, it's the egg with the most
Dr. Robotnik, Sonic, time to go, you're toast
I appear in every act with my Eggman ride
New moves, new plan, no place to hide
Every time you think you win I go back to my lab
creating new obstacles to foil your plan!

Everything about you but your rhymes are fat.
(BRRRRR!)
Did I do that?

Hey Sonic, tell Player 2 to stop jumpin' in spikes
That shit hurts even with these infinite lives
I'm the man with the rings and I'm MILES ahead of you
On a mission to turn you into robot stew
It's Tails in the sky givin' lifts to my bro
Anytime, anyplace, if you slow down though
Shit if you miss it - I'll get it, you got a problem - I'm on it
We'll take Robotnik and Metal Sonic and leave 'em runnin' in smoke

Don't forget to hit the save state back at the post
We need the Emeralds when we get to the end (I know.)
Or Robotnik's gonna mock us when we conquer the game
Don't hit me, I'm just bein' a friend (Shut up!)
We're gonna make it to the thing, gonna speed right through
Show these bitches how we do what we do
What the fuck, where'd you go? I'm talkin' to myself
What the hell happened to you?

I'm that two-tailed fox with them fly ass moves, you'll go-
(no, no, no)
Don't act like you don't know these moves are dope, you'll go-
(no, no, no, no)
Packin' these rings, bitch it ain't no thing, you'll go-
(no, no, no)
Tails is the name, Sonic's right-hand G you'll go-
(NO NO NO NO NO) STFU

It's time to get serious, Tails

Yo Tails, where the rings at? Gimme some more
Gotta find Dr. Robotnik and settle the score
I don't need no sidekick ridin' my shit
Followin' everywhere I go ridin' my big blue dick
Gimme a hand Tails, gimme a lift (Okay)
Thanks a lot little buddy, now go the fuck away
I've got a supersonic attitude, hear what I'm sayin'?
Gotta get those Chaos Emeralds and go Super Saiyan
Somebody's gotta motherfuckin' save the day
And I'm the only one quick enough to stay out of the way
Watch your back, if you know what's good for you
I will *mumbling*
You fuckin' robot makin' motherfucker ruinin' my mood
C'mon Tails, let's annihilate this Eggman dude
Now the plane's goin' down, but we're almost there
I'll smell ya later Tails, wish me luck (NO FAIR) haha

I just wanna eat chili dogs (Is that so much to ask?)
Smoke a bowl and squeeze out a log
I don't even really fuckin' care!

I am Metal Sonic feel my wrath
I got a dick like a chain saw
I'll cut you in half. HAHAHA

Bring it on, you can't replace this
Based on me on a first name basis
Why the fuck do you rap so slow?
Who do you think you are, Leo Camacho?

ERROR: Does not compute
Shoot my system froze, reboot
Scanning. Loading converter.
I am Sonic, insert girder.

What the fuck is this muthafuckin' bullshit?
That Robotnik just won't quit
I'm tired of this shit, I want a chili dog
I'm the real motherfucking Sonic the Hedgehog!

Activating Spin Ball
(Motherfucker, don't make me laugh)

I'll get you next time...
(Motherfucker, I just shut your ass down!)

(Don't ever compare me to Leo...)

One two three, here we come with the rings
It's Sonic and Tails, bitch pack your things
I learned a couple of magic tricks, you can call me Houdini
I got my Chaos Emeralds, barely competing
You're so clever Sonic. Where do you come up with these rhymes?
Sorry I'm in a bad mood, I've been waitin' outside
How 'bout you give me a chance, to be your sidekick guy?
Keep up that attitude, I'll punch you in your eye! (Oww!)

'Sup little bitches, yo my name is Knuckles
And I ain't comin' to this place here for shits and chuckles
So take a step back unless you wanna get knocked
'Cause I'm a bad motherfucker with some wicked dreadlocks
So I'm lookin' at ya Sonic, 'cause you think that you're fast
But if you go round for round, then you're never gonna last
'Cause your rhymes are old bro, I think it's a no-go
You sound kinda shitty like Duane and BrandO!
But that's how it goes, so don't get me pissed
I've got some big ass hands with some spikes on my fist
And I fly through the air with the greatest of ease
I'm gonna get a one-up bustin' up some TVs
Bitch please! I'll put your ass on disability
Then pimp smack your ass, take away your credibility
Wait- I gotta turn it around
We gotta find Robotnik and pound his ass to the ground
Now we're comin' for you and we're goin' straight through
Right to your HQ, got my nigga in blue
(And he's fast too!) (He is? Who?) Man I told you!
Catch up with Sonic and fuck up Robotnik!

I got it under control Tails, I'll get them shits back
When you fuck with a motherfucka' like me, you'll get bitch smacked
I'm way too fast, bitch understand
Motherfuckers talk shit and get the back of my hand
Like all day long and every night
I keep it cool like my name was Vanilla Ice
But I'm blue, not white, not wrong, too right
I'm so groovay, I'm out of sight
Like General Patton, I'm not talkin' 'bout Mike
I'm old school fool, Tails take the mic

D-Dodgin' bombs way cool, as we enter the arc
Thumbs up motherfucker, we be comin' with sparks
To get the rings back, Emeralds up, that's the way we do it punk!
Bring it on, tear it up! Absolutely don't give a fuck!
We're the motherfuckin' team flyin' by with skill
One rhyme left, goin' in for the kill
I got my mind on the rings and the rings on my mind
120 in my pocket but with plenty of time
Fast approachin'
Let me jump these bombs
Straight through the hole like I'm fuckin' it, nah
It doesn't really matter 'cause I see it right there.
It's Sonic and Tails and we just don't care
For sure!

BRRRRR!!!

It's time to meet your doom Sonic, I'm hauntin' your dreams
With my mean, bean, pokey thing killing machine!

What the fuck did you say? I wasn't payin' attention
I've destroyed you more times than I care to mention
Let's end this now, I got shit I gotta do
You motherfuckin' motherfucker, fuckin' whoobitydoo

You'll never make it Sonic, I'm the king of this game
All you woodland creatures are all the same
I'll barbecue your friends and wash it down with some nog
Check my MySpace bitch, I posted a blog.

I'll fuckin' roll you down the stairs like your name was "Log"
You'd better let my friends go you gluttonous hog
I'll down+A your face, let go of me tubs
It's been a long day chubby, gotta get me some grub
I'm starvin'

(What the ffffff)

(BRRRRR!!! HAHAHA)
So you want a chili dog? Too bad, I'm back!
What's that? You said you're fat? We knew that
Nooooooo I'm not fat, I'm big-boned!
Yeah right motherfucker, tell that to Star Jones!
Lemme set it straight and send you back to your lab
You gotta lose that weight, you gotta call yourself a cab
That's enough motherfucker, I'll throw my arm at you Sonic!
(Initiating targeting sequence)
Where'd you go Robotnik?

KAPOW!
I rumble the ground, do you think you can destroy me now? BRRRRR!
You cow, you fuckin' big round hairy and greasy fat smelly bitch
I'm gonna cook you over easy
HUMPTY DUMPTY!
(I said it)

I will destroy you and your friend Tails too!
I really don't think that's gonna happen, RoBUTTnik
I got the [Chaos Emeralds]
-SUPER SONIC-

Well hardy har har, three cheers for you
I'm really mad now, you have no clue! AroOoOo~

I'm not listening (Don't care) motherfucker

I'm waggin' my fist from the seat of my ride
With these pokey fingers there's no place to hide!

Still not listening (I really don't care) motherfucker

Anyways I'm gonna fuckin' tear your fuckin' shit apart
I gotta shit, I'm gonna fart, I think I sharted
OH NO!
HAHAHA
Track Name: ZELDA
Once upon a time in the land of Hyrule, everyone was okay and everything was cool.
Until the Dark Prince Ganon appeared and said:
"The Triforce is mine and everything is dead!"

Really?

Know your role, Link. I'll leave you black and blue, and by the way-. (What?!)
I kidnapped Zelda, too.

"Oh shit!" I thought to myself, what am I going to do?!
When I find your ass, I'm gonna straight end you.
Is that a mask or your real face, you big fat jerk?

"Come on and find out, Link!"
He said with a smirk.

I'll find my way to your maze, fill up on hearts along the way.
Today will be the last day of your life.

You're so gay. (No.)

Listen up Link.
Before your story begins, it's so complicated that you'll never win.
(You're jokin'!)
And that's why I'll detail it, 'cause you ain't shit!
I've got more important things to do than worry about it.
When your hearts run low, there are some fairies in the lake.
They will reload your energy like Frosted Flakes. (They're grrrrreat!)
For now that's all you're getting no more clues for you.
Enjoy motherfucker, 'cause you'll never get through!

That's what you think, I am the Infinite Hero, and I'll keep on fightin' until my health reaches zero.
Like my white tights, my patience is thin. (Haha.)

You won't amount to nothin', let the story begin. Oink!

Oww, take this sword!
I'm old!

The name's Link, (haha) and I'm braver than brave.
I got a wooden sword from an old man in a cave.
And when my hearts are maxed out, it shoots an energy blade?
I don't know how exactly that works, but that's okay with me.
Eventually I'll find my way out of this maze.
North, west, south, west, I'm on my way to the graves.
When I master the Master Sword, I'm goin' to town
on Zelda's upside down Triforce with one in the brown.
You can't stop me from comin', I am the Hero of Time!
You'd better run for your fuckin' life, I'm comin' inside. (Haha)

I'm here to destroy all of you one by one.
Makin' you disappear, come here, you know you can't run!
I got my magical shield, plenty of arrows to last me.
My boomerang is at full range, I'm a walkin' catastrophe.
Don't test me you motherfuckers, you can't hide.
You can try to run, but I got a map to where you reside.
I am the legendary fairyless wearin' a green tunic killin' everything motherfucker!
and I'm blowin' holes in the walls.
Goin' from dungeon to dungeon 'til every one of them falls.
This is my destiny, and I'm comin' for you!
It's a secret to everybody how I do what I do.
Eight mini-bosses dead, and I'm on my way to Ganon.
With all the weapons I got, who the fuck needs an arm cannon?!
I've died a million times and I'll die a million more, I'm at your fuckin' door!

Link! (Haha!) I see you've finally arrived.
Watch me disappear and reappear before your eyes.
Pleased to introduce you to my energy balls that will destroy you like nothing you've ever-!

No! I don't think so, now watch as I swing... aimlessly into the air without hitting anything. (Hahaaaa)

I got the Triforce, bitch! I ain't got time for hide-and-seek! Come get some!

Nooooooo, I think not. I'm Ganondorf, bitch!
Get your fairy booties out of here, 'cause you ain't shit!
It's swine time, my time to shine, Hyrule is mine. Mine all mine! Hahahahahaaaa!

One, two, three times I hit you with my blade!
Now it's time to shoot an arrow straight into your face! (Nooooo!)
It's been a great time killin' you swine, I gotta say!
But after all is said and done, I'm not even gettin' laid.

Well exCUUUUUUUSE me, Princess!

So I went through all that trouble and she's bein' a bitch.
I just saved her fuckin' life, and what the hell do I get?! (Nothin'!)
Fuck that shit, I should be gettin' some head, but Zelda's passed out early, layin' up in her bed.
I'm on the COUCH man! That's totally lame.
The upside down triforce is a totally different game.
That's cool, she'll come around eventually.
(Besides, she's in a coma in the next game, G. For real...)
Track Name: LITTLE NEMO
Verse:
It's time for bed, better go to sleep.
Got my pajamas on, and I brushed my teeth.
School's in the mornin' no time to waste.
It's the first day and I can't be late.
Now I'm off to a place with my homeboy Flip, with a pocket full of candy for them animals, bitch.
See, I can ride them for as long as I want, without delay!
On a search for keys, and other shit along the way.
This ain't a safe place for little kids to play...
But I'm dreamin' motherfucker, I'mma do it anyway.
Not like my parents can stop me, I'm fast asleep -unless they wake me up and get me somethin' to eat-.
My alarm ain't gonna go off for another couple minutes.
So I think I'm gonna look for these keys before I'm finished.
Name's Little Nemo, I'm the Dream Master.
Little bit of fun is all I'm after!

Chorus:
I'm gonna go to sleep, gonna lay in my bed.
Got candy canes and other shit runnin' deep in my head.
Said my name is Little Nemo and I'm proud to say; that I'm the Dream Master, baby, and I'm dreamin' away. (Come on!)
I'm gonna go to sleep, gonna lay in my bed.
Got candy canes and other shit runnin' deep in my head.
Said my name is Little Nemo and I'm proud to say; that I'm the Dream Master, baby, and I'm dreamin' away.

You better get your butt in bed, mister.

Verse:
Now it's the weekend I can stay up late...
But after I've eaten I'mma clean my plate.
Then go upstairs and get ready to sleep.
Comb my hair and brush my teeth.
See, I got a playdate with my homeboy Flip, with a pocket full of candy for them animals, bitch.
See, my name's Little Nemo and I am the shit.
And if you don't believe me you can suck my dick.

Chorus:
I'm gonna go to sleep, gonna lay in my bed.
Got candy canes and other shit runnin' deep in my head.
Said my name is Little Nemo and I'm proud to say; that I'm the Dream Master, baby, and I'm dreamin' away. (Come on!)
I'm gonna go to sleep, gonna lay in my bed.
Got candy canes and other shit runnin' deep in my head.
Said my name is Little Nemo and I'm proud to say; that I'm the Dream Master, baby, and I'm dreamin' away.
Track Name: MARIO 2
I'm back in this bitch, throwin' turnips and shit.
This ain't no 'Doki Doki Panic', deal with it.
It's Super Mario, in the motherfuckin' house.
Gonna blast the sunglasses off that bomb-throwin' mouse.
Yo Mario, don't confuse me with John Leguizamo.
He didn't have a mustache, but at least he got the hoes.
(Like in 'To Wong Foo'.)
I like 'The Pest', and I really really liked the Clown from 'Spawn'.
But when they cast him as Luigi, baby, that was just wrong. (Yeah that was just wrong. Wrong.)

The Princess is my character of choice. (Come on!)
But my balls are too big for me to rap in that voice,
and so I'll jump really high.Take a jog in the sky.
Hit the Pow Block, throw a fuckin' bird in your eye.
Anyway, we're on a mission to kill King Wart.
I heard a call for help... in my dream of course,
and then I woke up and saw the cave I seen in my sleep.
That's what I get for counting sheep. (Let's go!)

I'm in a cave now, tearin' this place down.
With these bombs that I pulled out of the ground.
L-L-Luigi's in the cave too, that is the truth.
P-Pullin' bombs out the ground like dentists pullin' out my tooth.
R-Representin' in this cave, b-bringin' d-down the r-roof. (Kaboom!)

(I don't know anyone that plays as Toad!)
Now I'm leavin' the cave, it's time to get on my way!
Headin' to the Birdo to save the day!
Defeated Fry Guy, Triclyde and Clawglip, bitch.
As I enter the Bird Head I clench my fist...

I am a motherfuckin' Birdo, look at my face!
I spit eggs motherfucker, straight into your face!
I'm so hardcore, I rhyme face with face!
I rhymed face four times, now get outta my face!
Am I an Ostro or a Birdo? Nobody knows!
I eat orbs for breakfast with no milk, mofo!
The inside of me glows; you suck and I blow.
Don't throw those back, I'll shoot fire up your nose!

How the fuck you gonna try and burn my 'stache, paisano?
You're tryin' to make me look like John Leguizamo?
Have some unfertilized dinosaur, ho!
Take that shit Hermaphrosaurus rex! Do the Mario!
Swing your arms from side to side! (Oh wait you can't, that's right!)
"You red-bowed weirdo, boy birds don't lay eggs!"
I say as I throw the last one in your face!

King Wart, pullin' life support!
I see you made it past all of my cohorts.
Get ready for my bubbles! Hold it right there!
Now it's time to turn this dream into a scary nightmare!
Beware! I bet you're scared!
I declare despair; not one life spared!
Well leapin' lasagna! You mean I'm dreamin' right now?!
I thought it was real. Either way you're goin' down!
I was wonderin' why the Princess wasn't taken this time!
Eat your fuckin' vegetables, it's time to die...
Track Name: MEGAMAN 2
Megaman:
I'm a super fightin' robot from the year 2010.
On a quest from Dr. Light to make the city safe again.
See all these robots were created to make the planet safe.
'Til Dr. Wily double crossed us and set fire to the place.
Dr. Wily had other plans to take over this bitch.
Re-programmed my brother and stole all them shits.
My name is Mega Man on my jet-dog Rush.
Got a cannon arm for y'all to keep your mouth shut, c'mon!

Wily:
Ve interrupt the program vit terrible news.
Dr. Light has been kidnapped by, GUESS WHO?!
DR. WILY THAT'S WHO! I'M COMING AFTER YOU TOO!
Wrong.
WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU'RE DOOMED!

Megaman:
Thanks Wily, it's not like I got shit to do.
Why not waste all of energy, fuckin' with you?!
C'mon Rush we gotta go and save Dr. Light.
And then teach Dr. Wily the wrong from the right, alright?

Protoman:
Hey bro, Proto Man here, so what's up?
I got eight of my buddies built, for messin' you up.
But who cares? I wish I did, but I'm just not built for that bro.
I gotta fly, hope you're ready to go.

(MM): SURE.
(PM): Choose carefully you motherfu-.
(MM): NO.
(PM): Why you gotta interru-?
(MM): NOPE. Nuh-uh. Don't think so.

Megaman:
If I'm gonna win I'll have to upgrade my shit.
Remember when I beat 'em to steal their power chips.
Charge my power beam when I enter the room.
And then boom-ba da-boom-boom boom-de-boom-boom.
To the windows, to the wall.
'Til the sweat drips from my balls.
I'm beatin' ya down to the fuckin' ground.
I got a Mega Buster for y'all, cmon!

Metal Man:
Metal Man will rock your shit! You're hit don't you forget it bitch!
Throw a saw blade into your face!
Let's face it you will taste my razor blades!

(MM): Umm, whatever you're the first boss bitch.
I don't even need a special power to take your shit.
(Metal): Yeah you're right, I'm no big deal...
(MM): One shot from my arm cannon, your power's a "steel"- DEAD.

I'm comin' to get you, fffucker.

Wood Man:
Stop yourself...
Hey there freak these freakin' woods are mine.
The name is Wood Man, have some freakin' leaves and vines.

(MM): Bitch I upgraded my cannon with some Metal Blade's for 'ya.
Fuck Mega Man I'm the forest-a-destroya!
(Wood): You'll never get passed my freakin' shield of leaves.
(MM): I'm Mega Man punk, don't you know me? BELIEVE IT.
(Wood): I guess I'll just throw the freakin' thing at your ass.
(MM): Jump over that shit, then your ass is grass- DEAD.

Two down, six more to go- beat you in a flash bitch, there 'ya-.

Flash Man:
FLASH!

(MM): Ahh...
(Flash): You fool, Flash Man in the House and I'm breakin' the rules!
(MM): No fair I'm frozen in the air.
(Flash): Time's on my side, no time to spare.
(MM): 'Bout to shoot these Metal Blade's straight in your face.
Put all of Wily's robots in their place!

Flash Man:
Leave you there so long you rust.
When I'm done here all that'll be left is dust.
My time to shine 'cause I'm better than most.
The trendsetter with the blue suit, you're toast!

Megaman:
Umm, I got a blue suit too? At least I'm not as silly as you.
I'm gonna throw this Metal Blade and cut a hole in your ass.
I think I'll have my dog Rush take a picture of that, DEAD.

Bubble Man:
The name's Bubble Man and I got somethin' to say...

Megaman:
DEAD. I'm not fuckin' with you.

Air Man:
Look up in the sky, it's a bird, it's a plane.
It's Air Man bitch, and I'm bringin' the pain!
I got a fan installed, in my grill, no lie.
I'm gonna blow your ass straight off the map, GOODBYE.

Megaman:
Beat you breathe you make you Co2.
Blow all you want my Leaf Shield repels you.
So blow me phony, your whole act's baloney.
You don't even pose a threat I'm not frettin' it homie.

Air Man:
SHIT! I'm as useless as Bubble Man.

Megaman:
Wow that's fuckin' pathetic my leaves jammed your fan- DEAD.

I'll sneak up, and hit ya like a fuckin' tornado.
Puttin' Crash Man in the trash can like yesterday's tomatoes.

(Crash): C'mon now...
(MM): Crashin' the party it's Mega Man baby. Mega Man's in the house!
(Crash): Quit messin' around...
(MM): It's all gravy.
(Crash): I... will fuck you up.
I'monna fuck you up, Mega Man. You can't catch me!
(MM): Totally total your ass, I ain't messin' around.
(Crash): I... will throw a bomb, and then I will jump around-.
What's that sound I hear?
(MM): That shit's the wind and it's pullin' ya down.

Quick Man:
I'm Quick Man dressed in red.
I got a yellow boomerang, attached to my head.

Megaman:
Look without the guilt I'll fuckin' drink you in milk.
For tryin' to destroy this planet we built.

(Quick): Oh c'mon Mega, don't be sour!
(MM): What I lack with speed I make up for in POWER.
(Quick): You can't touch my turbo skill.
(MM): With the Crash Bombs, I'm comin in for the kill- DEAD.

(MM): Anyone got a light? I need a cigarrette.
(PM): Here 'ya go bro.
(MM): Bitch you're gonna regret.
(PM): Uhh, one more boss, don't forget, I'd love to stay, but I gotta jet!

Megaman:
'Sup Heat Man let's do this fast.
My pussy-ass brother just bailed on your ass.
It's time to blow bubbles, the bad kind though.

Heat Man:
Don't get too close, I might blow.
Who knows what flows from the Earth? I DO!
I'm gonna spew red goo all over your shoes.
I got a face for radio and a box for a suit.

(MM): Capcom really didn't spend much time on you.
(Heat): NOPE.

Megaman:
Check it out, I'm tired of you.
I gotta get to Light before his time is through.
I got my cannon ready, I got huntin' to do.

Heat Man:
I've got more hot than a cow has moo.
I will burn you with my flame!
Zippo is my middle name!

Megaman:
I'm done fuckin' around, eight-bit clown.
Here's a bubble have fun six feet underground- DEAD.

I'm comin' to get you, you German bastard!

Wily:
You will never make it through my fortress, Mega Man.
I'm taking over the world! WAHAHAHAHAHA!

Megaman:
Shit, c'mon Rush we've gotta make it through the castle.
Over the ladder and make it to the battle.
Dr. Light needs our help and the world needs his genius.
Wily can suck a penis! J-J-Jump over the roof.
Charge my cannon and shoot.
Come and face me like a man you old coot.
I'm tired of fightin' robots and cleanin' up your messes.
I'm takin' out the trash, it's time to learn a lesson.
So come down to the ground out of your spaceship.
You ain't got the BALLS to be fuckin' with this shit.
After I take you I'll rip outchya brain!
They won't even remember your name, c'mon.
You fuckin' meanie, you 10-pound weenie.
To get the world you'll have to go through me.
My name is Mega Man you can call me "Rock".
'Cause I'll be rockin' your shit up and down the block.
And that's how we ROLL.

Roll:
Need my help?

Megaman:
Nuh-uh, get back in the kitchen, shit is under control.
It's a man's world baby, don't be flashin' ya vag.
Here's my back hand bitch you got a prob'm with that?
Saw blade the Mecha Dragon I just won't quit.
Quick Boomerang the Guts Dozer hit the switch.
Mega Man motherfucker and I'm rockin' this bitch!

Wily:
Mega Man! You're right on time.
I will annihilate you once and for all. You're mine!

Megaman:
I'll shoot you down from the sky, you'll never take me alive.
With these Metal Blade's I'm packin' you'll die, that's no lie!

Wily:
Join us Mega Man we could take over this place.
Dominate the human race.
Face it you could always be replaced!

Megaman:
You old geezer, I'll take your ass down any day.
You'll never be as smart as Dr. Light is any way!

Wily:
You're artificial Mega Man, what do you care?
I'll tear the world apart without you I hope you're prepared.

Megaman:
What the fuck?! You're an alien, you've gotta be kiddin' me.
You nut sack don't fight back I'll embarrass you E.T.

Wily:
Dr. Wily phone home! I do love Reeses...
You're nothing but a thesis, I'll blow you to pieces.

Megaman:
Check it out, here's my bubble, I'm done with ya crazy.
Now get on your knees and cry like a lady!
DEAD!
...Yer mother.
Track Name: ZELDA II
Once upon a time in the land of Hyrule, everyone was okay and everything was cool.
Until the Dark Prince Ganon appeared and said:
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!"

That's right!
And now everything's great.
And its almost my 16th birthday.
Now all of a sudden I got a mark on my hand.
(You must find the Triforce of Courage.)
Not again!

Lets open up the door to the North Palace.
Now I'm reading this ancient scroll, so calloused.
Zelda fell asleep a long time ago?
Is it the same Zelda? Am I the same Link? (Who knows?)

This game is so confusing. When the hell does it take place? (I don't know!)
Which Zelda did I rescue? Where the hell's my boomerang? (I don't know!)

You and everybody else in the world, Duane.
You know I love this game, bro. I ain't complainin'.
So, I guess I'll just type in my name.
Just pretend its the same game.
Switch my mind-frame.
It's a whole new quest.
It's no contest, G.
I'm making this a conquest, Don't question me.
You see this game doesn't get enough notoriety.
So let's do this fuckin' thing before I just play 3.

The name's Link.
But you already know.
I got the flow.
And the know-how.
This wisdom and the Power. (let's go!)
I bet the townsfolk can help me on my tedious quest.
Get candle in Parapa Palace, Go west!
Okay... (Liar!)
We all know it's in the East.
Plenty of beasts.
But I got my shield spell at least.
Rest in peace.
As I stab you in your face.
I got 6 different crystals to open the gate.
To the Valley of Death and fight the guardian that awaits.
To get the Triforce of Courage, wish Zelda back awake.
Clean slate.
Recreate.
Relate with no hate.
Replace it with my magical shield and this blade.

I walked off the path and I was unprepared.
I've got 1 heart and monsters are everywhere.

(Bullshit! That just ain't fair. Shut the fuck up, Ganon! Nobody cares!)

A little frustrated BrandO?

Only a cunt hair.
You ain't seen shit I got the strength of a bear.
That has the strength of ten gorillas. I'll kill you dead.
I got a shit ton of spells, but I think that I'll stab you instead.
I'll fight mightily until everything is all right.
I am the Hero of Time and now it's time to say goodnight.

Well I made it to the palace, I got nothin' to lose.
Ridin' up and down on these elevators (Awesome dude!)
I gotta find the key to open up these doors first.
Before I lift this curse that's been put on this earth.
I'll stab that fuckin' Horsehead and put him on my wall.
Helmethead ain't gonna be a fuckin' problem at all.
That ghost ridin' Reubenok licks ghost horse balls!
Reflect Carock's spells, brawl with Gooma, and make Barba fall!
I'll kill 'em all bitch Thunderbird is a joke!
I'll cast Fire and the smoke from your face will make you choke.
So don't provoke me.
I'm focused on killin' every one of you.
Bring back the peace and wake the princess, why you runnin' dude?

Come here and get what's coming to ya, bring it on bitch.
I'll split your fuckin' face apart and cook it like and omelette.
I'm on top of it there ain't no stoppin' this shit.
I'll leave your runnin' ass 'Walken' like your name was Chris.

Nanaki's View in this track, Chris is rockin' them shits.
Bringin' me straight though the battle rippin' guitar licks. (Ha ha!)

You know that I will save you.
I'm made to.
I'm breaking through.

You know that I have faith, Link.
I'll wait, Link.
I'll wait for you.

You have no choice, love.

I know that you'll rescue me.
This is our destiny.

I hear your voice, love.
I've only just met you but something inside of me drives me on.
So I battle.
Who are you!?

I'm your shadow!
I come from the darkness, your blasphemous side.
Created by hatred and eyes in the sky.
After I beat you, I'll live in your mind.
And use the Triforce to bring Ganon to life!
Look in my eyes, we are one of a kind!
Same moves!
Same tights!
Same fuckin' drive!

You underestimate me, me, I've got us all figure out.
So go and swing into the air like during me and Ganon's last bout.
Shout for your mama, Shadow, fear my light.
I'm like a lightning storm, frightening you, haunting your night.
You're just a shadow of the best there ever was and ever will be.
I'll make you look like fuckin' Peter Pan, you'll never kill me.

NO! I know all your moves, I feel all your pain!
You're a slave to the princess, a fucking shame!
Hyrule could be ours, take my hand.
We can rule the kingdom, devour the land.
You'll never defeat me, you know that I'm right.
You're a servant, a pawn, and your living a lie!

I'm gonna live and let you die, bitch, cause I don't need you.
I think I'll just crouch down over here and stab your knees, dude.
Stabby, stab, stab, how you like that shit?
I'm gonna call your Error 'cause your fuckin' useless.
I'll bet your knees are more sore than a Flint-town whore.
And when I'm finished with you, well, maybe I'll score.

I just beat the game!
Yes I did!

You saved Hyrule.
And you're a real hero!

I know right?
(That's right!)
I got zero fear, ho.
Yo, check it out, princes, gimme a kiss.
You know you can't resist these lips, watch this.
When the curtain goes down, Link's goin' up

Oh stop yourself.

Well excuuuuuuus--

Shut up.

There's only one way to shut me up, I mean besides.
We're brother and sister in the next game right?

(For real.)

I guess you've got a point.
Track Name: FINAL FANTASY
Once upon a time in the land of Melmond, the splendor of vegetation decayed. (C'mon.)
It was prophecised that four stunnin' Light Warriors would come and save the day. (What what what.)
Arrivin' in Corneria, in the midst of their deliria, four motherfuckers emerged! (Hell yeah.)
To teach a valued lesson.
Bet you'll count your blessin's at the beating that's about to occur. (Here we go.)
I am the fighter. (Name's [Dune]!)
I'm the leader of the gang.
Can't use any magic but I'm critically acclaimed.
Introducin' the Red Mage, the jack of all trades.
Both magic, crazy tactics, leavin' 'em all in their graves!
Then there's the Black Belt and the Black Mage.
Clumsy with their hittin', but fixin' to put a hurtin' on all of you fuckin' bitches.
Don't forget after this, we gotta stop at the shop.
I ain't doin' much damage with this rock in a sock!
I am the Red Mage, pimpin' a feather in my hat.
The name's [JoJo], need somethin'? Yeah I got that.
Watch your step, 'cause I stand where you fall.
Eloquent abilities and that's not all.
Ostentatiously fashionable. What's my name, bitch?
Light you on fire, and then I'll heal your shit.
Just to burn you again and then I'll cut you in two.
It takes three men just to do what I do!
And that's my cue.
Pointy hat, coat of blue.
Burnin' bright yellow eyes, and I do what I do.
'Cause I learned the dark arts from another time and age, bow down to me bitches 'cause I'm the Black Mage.
I got my wizard hat on and I'm lookin' somethin' vicious.
All the ladies call me "Lucky" 'cause I'm magically delicious.
Four spaces for a name? Bitch, I only need three.
[L-E-O] sign me up for the Final Fantasy!

I've just heard a legend as a prophecy.(uh huh)
That four strapping young lads would come and see me.(really?)
And all my majesty and save the Princess, see.
And put a damn stop to the Elemental Fiends!
The good knight Garland -until recently-, (NO!)
broke in and stole the fucking Princess from me!
Don't worry 'bout it sir we're gonna take Garland down.
But we're gonna need some weapons, 'fore we go into town.
LET'S GO.

Oh great we're at the town shop.
Black Mages can't equip shit so, I'll wait outside...
"Yay Leo".
Just take your time...
Hahaha.
Yeah, get out of here Corey Feldman!
I guess I'll go buy some spells (and I'll find them all well!) find something else to do with my time.
That's fine!
Quit with the bitchin' get back in the kitchen.

Goin' on our way to the Temple of Fiends.
Damned Imp better stay the hell away from me.
Yo Spud hit 'em with your nunchakus, G.
See if we can go and gain some gold and EXP.
These wolves won't stop comin' after me!
But ain't nothin' compared to these spiders, see!
With you here JoJo, to cast [Ruse] on me, nothin's stoppin' us from buildin' up the GP!
Damn Leo why you keep gettin' hit?
You're bringin' the team down, I'm sick of this shit!
You're a mediocre mage and you're trippin' JoJo.
I think it's time for you to get your ass in the back row.
Once we get to the temple, you'd better up your energy.
Now everybody armor up and get behind me.
Surrender the princess or we're takin' ya down.
We're gonna run your ass up out of town. C'mon!

Hahahahaha...
Your defense is weak.
Fought imps tougher than you.
Good knight turned bad knight?
Good night for you.
Surrender the Princess or surrender your life.
I'm light speeds ahead of you, now bleed on my knife!
That was a critical hit!
Critics are thumbin' in awe.
Garland you look like shit, go home and cry to your 'Ma.
Who do you think you are boy, the Light Warriors?
Don't make me laugh, although you ARE glorious.
How do you get your hair to match your armor so well?
I bet your manicurist has a DOZEN stories to tell.
Uh-huh.
Stand aside boy. I'll make a mockery of you!
Well you'll be pushin' up roses 'fore the time that I'm through.
You done it now, shut your mouth, look what you made me do!
Haha!
You can't keep up with me you fuckin' slow ass punk.
Your little knife ain't gonna stop my powerful nunchakus.
Once you were the best knight in the kingdom.
Now you're nothin' but a fuckin' crumb bum, chum! (Yeah!)
I bite my thumb at you bitch!
HOW DARE YOU?!
I'm back in this part just to fix up my glitch.
Is that all you've got, you vexatious queef?
I'll knock you down, I'll make you wish you would've chosen Thief.
Your nunchaku are as deadly -if not more so- than you.
And that isn't saying much, but it's true!
Hahahaha.
Have at you!
You were just lucky when you landed that blow.
For sho'!
But mine won't even show with my back up, bro.
So back up, bro!
Your back up?
Yes.
Oh no!

You think you've won, but your story has only begun.
I summon four ferocious Fiends from beyond the Sun.
Well God damn you and your fuckin' shit I'm goin' home!
No!
Shit, there better have been pizza 2,000 years ago.
Yeah you ASSHOLE!

Thank you all, you fuckin' saved me.
Without you four people I don't know where I'd be!
Now saddle up fellas, and get inside of me.
That's one hell of a way to increase your HP!
Now let's go see the King I hear he built us a bridge.
We can go to the town where all the pirates live.
Muscle up some scallywags, and get us a boat, so we can sail the seas and punch fish in the throat.

Three sheets to the wind and I'll show ya the ropes.
I'm Bikke the pirate, I'll put a hook in your throat.
Yo Bikke check it out I'm gonna slaughter your crew.
Now gimme your ship.
Who's next?
Or I'mma do it to you!
It's already been five minutes since we started this song.
That's four Ninja Gaiden songs way too long.
Yarr! You killed me mates, they're a pain in me bum.
You can take me ship but I'm keepin' me rum.

My name is Matoya and I got me some herb.
If you find my crystal I can hook you up.
Word!
Is it just me... or are my broomsticks talkin'?
Crazy backwards words like "Christopher Walken"?
Let me take another toke and hope you find my shit.
'Cause if you don't you won't be gettin' no herb, legit?
Shit, break out the Cheez Whiz we gonna have a party.
We'll find that fuckin' crystal and I'll break out the Bacardi.
Ya got a sexy voice, call me up some time.
...Or we'll be back with the crystal if you change your mind.

(Destroy all of them
Kill them one by one
Tear them into shreds
This will be so fun)

I rescued the Princess, and, leveled up my crew.
Bitch I done evened out the odds, now I'm comin' after you.
I got my mind on the prize, I'm takin' what's mine.
Tell Doc Brown to get the DeLorean.
We's goin' back in time, bitch.


(Garland is no more
Chaos reigns supreme
So you want some more
Check out my four fiends)

Destroyed Lich with fire, and Kary with might.
Sockin' Kraken blockin' knockin' as we nuke Tiamat tonight.
Ya na na na.
I got the crystals time to go back to the past.
As I put this motherfuckin' sword in Chaos' ass!

Those fools are on their way they'll RUE the day they came my way.
I'm CHAOS... In the flesh.
The Fiends compare to fleas compared to me.
It's GREAT to be pure CHAOS.
I laid Erdrick to rest.
And one by one you'll die by my hand.
Oh look what I've become...
This fantasy is far from final... the worst is yet to come.

Rescued the Princess and captured the ship.
We got the Mystic Key from Elven Prince.
Defeated Lich, Kary, Kraken and Tiamat with a chortle.
Orb of Earth, Fire, Water, Air, opened the portal!
Went back 2,000 years to the Temple of Fiends.
Now we're four Light Warriors hauntin' your dreams!
You're goin' down Chaos, you shouldn't fuck with my crew.
Or Leo, JoJo, Spud and I are gonna show you how we do.
YOU MOTHERFUCKER, we've beat you before and we'll do it again.
Every time you fuckin' rise until this fantasy ends.
You'd better stay on your guard, 'cause when I strike you're gonna feel it!
You fuckin' piece of shit, you're goin' down bitch.
I MEAN IT.

Chaos I got a prob'm witcho muh-fuckin' ass.
That's why I captured the Crystals and came back to the past.
Battled many foes on my way to you, and I won't think twice about destroyin' you, too.
IIII won't be so forgiving this time around. (Say WHAT?!)
IIII will put you in the ground! (Hahahahaha...)
You can't stop me now, I'm more powerful than you.
You puny half-wit, I'll hit you with my dick!
Chaos reigns upon you and you question yourself.
You find that messing with the best is never good for your health. HAHA.
Bitch you'd better go home, and cry to your mom. (Your mom!)
'Cause I've been fuckin' practicin' and takin' my time. (My time!)
You're good, but you're no Sephiroth.
You're startin' to piss me off right now...
Right nowoww...
Right now...
Right nowoww...

I'm gonna fuckin' kick you in your stupid fuckin' face!
Your defense is weak.
Fought Imps tougher than you.
Good knight turned bad knight?
Good knight for you.
I got so much HP you can call me Terminator.
'Cause these motherfuckin' muscles are buffer than Schwarzenegger's.
Take a tip from my crew bitch, it's time to bow out!
After that we'll have a motherfuckin' night on the town.
'Cause it's a random battle system and you're ass gonn' be hurtin'.
And I'll be bustin' out my tricks, like my name was Lance Burton.
8-bit motherfuckers and we're fully equipped with swords, and staves and knives, all kinds of magical shit.
Let's go!
How can this be happening?! This can't be true!
Well I'mma kick you in your motherfuckin' face, you're through.
You done it now, shut your mouth look what you made me do!
I got a thousand volts of lightning runnin' through my veins.
Three foot of steel in my hand, and its flavor is pain.
You been playin' with fire, now you're gonna get burned.
You're in over your head, another lesson to be learned.
I'm gonna run you through, you're gonna pay for your crime, FUCKER!
I just cast HASTE and now you're runnin' out of time.
They call me Chaos for a reason, boy, don't be ridiculous.
As of late I've found that time itself is rather meticulous.
I am IMMORTAL, I have inside me blood of KINGS!
You and your friends will die here and I'll destroy everything.
We are the LIGHT WARRIORS bitch, you heard what I said.
We're gonna end this paradox, you're only strong in your head!
You may think you're safe in this time loop... but now you're DEAD.
Track Name: KUNG FU [REMIX]
I'll take five at one time, knock you down in a row.
Dodgin' knives with the quickness and a kick to your scro'.
I got that kung fu kill you without thinkin' attitude.
I'll straight up fuckin' Bruce Lee ya kick your ass to the Moon.
"So door igamo set say llamo Tamagotchi Ali"!
I dunno what exactly that means I don't speak no Chinese.

One with my foot; one with my fist.
One not breathin' no more, now hear this!
I got that fuckin' Chuck Norris Texas Ranger attitude.
Straight up smack you like a bitch and then be laughin' at you.
You see this dojo ain't big enough for the both of us, G.
I gotta kung fu you before you FU me!

I take 6 at one time, knock you down in a row.
You thought the song was over, but it goes and goes and goes.
They took my ho, now I'm throwin' all of the 'bows.
We're goin' toe-to-toe, yo, I'm jammin' toes in ya nose.
In the rain or in the snow, I got the funkiest flow.
You don't wanna test me, that's fo sho.
Track Name: AIR [REMIX]
Singing is easy… (Singing is easy).
When you have machines… (When you have machines).
To do it for you. (Cliche, cliche, cliche).
Nothing really matters any more.
It's redundant and mindless; but at least you can dance.
(Stop listening to bad music).
You know every word of the radio version.
It's a force fed, romance.
Stop listening to bad music.
(Stop listening to bad music).
This is the part where I pour out my heart; like I'm still in high school.
This is the part where I pour out my heart.

(Stop listening to bad music).
Doesn't it hurt…
They're dumbing it down for us; and isn't it sad that I had to sing badly to record those parts?
It's redundant and mindless; but at least you can dance.
(Stop listening to bad music).
It's redundant and mindless; but at least you can dance.

It's redundant and mindless; but at least you can dance.
Nothing really matters any more.
This is the part where I pour out my heart; like I'm still in high school.
This is the part where I pour out my heart.

Throw a little hi-hat into the mix.
Add some motherfuckin' bass drum, roll them shitz.
Get that snare drum, ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta.
Add some bass to the rhythm for some high-class rock.
Lesson one: you're a gangster with money and hos; sellin' rocks on the street robbin' convenience stores.
Lesson two: throw some scratches for that beasty rap.
Talk about your MC and, lean back.
Lesson three: drop the beat; bring it back. Talk about your mother, drugs, sex, guns and crack.
What do you know, you're on the radio, with them fancy cars and mansions for sho'.
Just remember to save your money, don't spend it all on drugs;
Or you'll be stuck selling records in "The Adventures of".
Track Name: THE CARPET IS LAVA
Get your ass in the kitchen!
Do what you is told.
The sink is full of dishes.
The tub is full of mold.
I have no clean underwear.
I'll have to think of more chores.
Get your ass on your knees with a toothbrush and scrub my fuckin' floors.

Duane... Dude, what the fuck are you doing?
How many times do I have to tell you, dude...
You're doin' it all wrong...

Ya gotta do it like this:
Kick her in the face in the jaw.
Kick that bitch 'til ya can't kick no more.
Then ya do a little jig like this.
(Like this?)
Then ya hit her in the mouth with ya fist.
(With my fist...)

Awww shiiit...
BrandO said knock you out.
I'm about to show you what it's all about.
I'll throw a motherfuckin' shoe (Thats right!)
And then I'll tell her what to fuckin' do. (uh huh!)
She loves the abuse, don't let her lie to you!
A woman ain't nothin' but a thing to screw.

Hey guys I brought the game with me... What the fuck...

I'm gonna call the cops!
You can't hit a woman like that!
Ya gotta buy 'em flowers!
Where's my baseball bat?!

Let's put his ass in the trunk.
Take him to the river then dump this punk.

(911, what's your emergency?)
They hit me in the face! (Yeah?)
They hit me in the jaw! (Mhmm?)
I'm sorry but I had noone else to call.
They threw a fuckin' shoe at me and broke my nose!
My eye's puffin' like a motherfuckin' crescent roll. (yeah?)
When they headed outside I locked the door.
I had to drag my lifeless body all across the floor.
I'm bleedin' real bad and I got 2 black eyes!
(Bitch you should probably listen better next time.)
Track Name: ENDLESS RELENTLESSNESS
There is a need we need to feed
And it's greed we succeed in feeding on

What we must do is trust one another and smother the others with fun rubber gloves and love

No one will miss him!

Lust is just a frustrating justice

Go after that!

Ridiculous how ticklish we all are

Get your dirty tuna fish sandwich out of my face
Nobody calls me "poo-poo" and gets away with it.

I am the Dragon Warrior!

Go after that!

I am forever!

I shit peanuts!
I shit peanuts!
Endless Peanuts!

I SHIT PEANUTS!

No one will miss him!

Go after that!

Endless Relentlessness
Endless Relentlessness

Peanuts!

With this fist, my dentist has been dismissed

No one will miss him!